counting chest bullets


Melancholy men of all others are most witty — Aristotle

nameless beerhouse elegy

By Angelo Suárez

“True company is rare and must be kept raw with drink, distance, a few fangs, and scandals”
-Ricardo de Ungria

Why people call this place “Kittens”
you will never understand, save for nights
the occassional cat drops by for its ration
of strokes &random caresses. Or why

people sometimes call it “Batcave”
when no bat at all hangs upside-down
its topside of peeling paint & rotting wood
to sleep or drop its share of guano.

What you do know is what goes straight
to your heads no longer comes out
alcohol but wisdom, that what passes
thru your veins is not polluted blood

but verses, satanic ones, the type
that finds itself not scrawled on pages
but floating on a puddle of puke
disgorged by a friend who has long

since drifted away. And you
miss him; each bottle you raise each time
is a tribute to him whom you met
at the nearby school a street-cross

away where once in your lives you
called each other brothers, allies
of the pen, this pointless vocation.
Volitionbe your guide, erudition

on craft the raft that sails you thru
stormy seas of imagination, rivulets
of beer, puke, imagery, & metaphor–
pathways that lead to that homeland

you call poem. And this place serves
as port of passage, & life has never
been the same since you got here.
What you aim for’s not for wimps,

a poet wrote, & not for wimps it is.
Imps, maybe; perhaps even enemies–
one of whom you once shared this
table with, chicharong bulaklak,

isaw as convoluted as your friendships,
your lives. And there isn’t any name
for this sort of familiarity, the way no one
has names for things that truly matter,

like this breerhouse, for instance–
for which all you do now is approximate
nomenclatures, as always. Make do
with monikers momentary as memory,

fleeting as a friend’s face, passing
quickly like occassional cats, imaginary
bats, their crap falling at a speed
you wish could also apply to forgetting.


Filed under: Cheers, flash, The Hobby

i won’t like this for my epitaph

Music: All I want – Toad the Wet Sprocket

This is not the exact text i would like to see in my epitaph.

Hmm. O well, di ko naman malalaman e. Maybe some stupid person will probably etch it 45 years from now. Anyway, di naman un ang point ng entry nito. I went to Kittens last night and just looked around, catched the feel of the place for the last time. Talked to Manang about the status of the place: kung kelan sila aalis and kung kulan idedemolish ang place. Naghihintay nga daw silang magkakapitbahay ng 100k para sumibat na, pero sabi din nya kahit 30k lang solve na sya. She also asked me kung sino daw iyong girl na kasama ko noong one time kame nag-inuman nila red and ronald and i told her about mics. Hmm. Madamedame din kami napag-usapan ni manang kittens and what’s weird is that for seven years that i’ve been drinking there, hindi pala niya alam ang pangalan ko. And i told him it’s wes. Just plain wes. don’t know kung may last inuman pa sa kittens. Hmm. Any plans Red, Ronald, Gelo, Eric? It will surely be a blast to have one.

Filed under: Cheers, flash

dahil ba sa liver cirrhosis ‘yan?

Music: Jumper – Third Eye Blind

Cause of deaths: Liver Cirrhosis. Malamang sa Kittens pinaglamayan itong mga mokong na ‘to. Anyway, kudos to the person who made this picture. JL, ikaw ba gumawa nitong pic? Nakita ko kasi ‘tong picture sa friendster page mo e. Kung ikaw nga, Astigas ka!

Filed under: Cheers

trip to pampanga

Hmmm. This is a nice group pic of team goodbye-atay. Am probably on my way to Tagaytay to attend Ate Dynah’s wedding. O well, i missed another memorable group shot.

Filed under: Cheers